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My first and only interview submission to Lemmy's Land, which I did with The Big D a few years ago before he dissapeared.
Before the Interview...
Big D- So, seeing as you three can't do a decent job, I'm firing you!
King Dedede, Meta Knight and Waddle Dee- WHAT?!
Big D- And, I'm replacing you!
Someone knocks at the door...
Big D- Come in!
Iggy walks in.
Iggy: Hello Big D!
Big D- Get out.
Iggy- Why?
Big D- You're in my office.
Iggy- So...?
Big D- Can someone deal with him, please!
Waddle Dee kicks Iggy out of the room and shuts the door.
Big D- Thanks! For that, you can stay!
Waddle Dee- Thank you! So, who's interviewing with you?
Big D- Everyone, prepare to meet... CliveKoopa!
CliveKoopa walks through the door.
Clive Koopa: Hey Big D.
Clive sits down on the chair opposite from The Big D.
Big D- So, let's get this party started!
At the Interview studio...
Big D- Welcome to...
Lemmy- Lemmy's Interview Show!
Big D- Today, I've brought a friend! Please welcome, CliveKoopa!
The audience claps and cheers.
Clive: Thank you everyone, I love you all!
Big D- Our guest audience member is infamous for his machines! Please welcome, Dr Eggman and his partner Metal Sonic!
Dr Eggman- I'm flattered!
Metal- ...
Dr Eggman- Metal Sonic said "Hi."
Big D- Me and CliveKoopa will be interviewing Iggy Koopa!
Iggy- I'm feeling really nervous...
Big D- So Iggy, why did you want to be interviewed?
Iggy: Because I want to show the whole world just how awesome I am!
Big D- You're not awesome.
Iggy- ... You have a cruel sense of humor, don't you?
Big D- How can you jump higher than your brothers and sister?
Iggy- I've been training for the High Jump since I first saw the Koopa Olympics.
Big D- In Mario World, why were you battling Mario on a giant bowl?
Iggy- I was hoping to send him into the lava by charging at him, but he got the better of me...
Clive scowls at the mention of Mario's name
Clive: Ahem, why is your hair green now and why are you so skinny?
Iggy: I'm on a diet, can't you tell?
Clive: (sarcastically) Oh yeah, heh heh heh...
Iggy: As for my hair, well I decided I should change my image a little. I thought it would help me boost my confidence against Mario, plus I just like it.
Big D- What's with the glasses?
Iggy- They trick people into thinking that I'm weak. And... I can't see properly.
Big D- Why were you somewhat insane in NSMBWii?
Iggy- After Mario beat me in Yoshi's Safari, I went insane from the damage that Mario did to my mech. Sadly, that has made a permanent mark on my life.
Big D- Should we go to audience questions?
Clive: Yes, you in seat 45!
Koopa Troopa: Hey, you promised me I would become a general when you took over Giant Land's castle. Why haven't I become one yet?
Iggy: I don't remember promising that. Next...
The Koopa Troopa sits down sadly.
Clive: You in Seat 56, what's your question?
Roy: Yeah, your glasses make you look really weak, why don't you get a pair like mine? My glasses are obviously cooler.
Iggy- I can't see through sunglasses! How can you?
Roy- ... Remind me to pound you when this ends!
Big D- Seat 7!
Gloomtail- Why do you like Chain Chomps?
Iggy- They're fierce, and they like me!
A Chain Chomp eats Iggy's hair.
Iggy- NOOOO! It took months to make it stand!
Big D- Seat 54!
Dry Bones- Why didn't you save us from Mario? Why?!
Iggy- How was I supposed to know that Mario would beat us? I thought I had everything setup, but as always Mario is just a big cheat. We stand no chance against those Stars of his. But don't worry, Mario will be mine next time.
Clive- How do you plan on beating him?
Iggy- I'll use his own powers against him. In fact, Ludwig is already working on a way to give us Koopas the same powers as those Mario Brothers.
Clive- Sounds good, would it work on a regular Koopa Troopa like myself?
Iggy- Ludwig is working on that, and soon, the Mushroom Kingdom will belong to the Koopas.
Big D- I believe that our special guests have questions! Dr Eggman?
Dr Eggman- If you ruled the world, what would you do with it?
Iggy- I'd turn it into a Chain Chomp paradise!
Metal- ...
Dr Eggman- Metal Sonic said... "I want to know if you're fast enough to beat me in a race! Are you?"
Iggy: Yeah, I'll race you anytime. I'm the fastest Koopa around!
Clive: Yes, seat number 77!
Waluigi: What about kart racing?
Iggy: Yeah, I'll beat anyone at kart racing. Me and Lemmy always go racing...
Metal Sonic reconnects his vocal unit so that he can speak.
Metal- Is that so?
Iggy- Yeah! I'm the Kart Racing Champion in Dark Land!
Metal- Here's my proposal. If you beat me in a race around the Mushroom Kingdom, I'll give you unlimited power! So, are you up to it?
Iggy- Yeah!
Big D- A few more questions... Seat 99!
Larry: Why did you steal my method of trying to beat Mario in Super Mario World?
Iggy: You obviously stole my method, I had the idea first. Besides, how was I supposed to know you would have the same idea?
Clive: Okay, seat 15 please, what's your question?
Lemmy: Hey Iggy, when are we going go-karting again?
Iggy: You can take part with me in the next grand prix with Metal Sonic and whoever else dares to enter!
Lemmy: All right. This is going to be a blast!
Big D- Final question! Seat 13!
???- Why did you get rid of your Interview crew?
Big D- Because they couldn't do a decent job!
??? is Dr Roo, who left after the first Interview with Badyoyo!
Dr Roo- They miss you. Didn't you know?
Big D- Welcome back, old friend! Where are the others?
Dr Roo- They were captured by Mario. You should save them...
Big D- Clive, could you takeover while I find my crew?
Clive: Sure thing. You go and show that Mario the meaning of business!
Clive waits for Big D to leave before speaking again.
Clive: So Iggy, how is Ludwig going to let us use the same powers as Mario?
Iggy: Well I don't know the full details, but Ludwig took a sample of Mario's DNA from a time when he was unconscious, and he is researching all of Mario's special powers as well as genetics and stuff. That's all I know for now...
Clive: What does it take to be a great go-kart racer?
Iggy: Loads of experience. I plan on becoming the champion.
Meanwhile, at Peach's Castle...
Mario- So, I heard that you got fired...
Meta Knight- So? What's it got to do with you?
Mario- I have an offer for you... If you destroy The Big D, I'll reward you...
Waddle Dee- No way!
Mario- What if I bribed you with pizza?
Waddle Dee- I'll do it!
Mario- For Meta Knight, would you kill your master for some cookies?
Meta Knight- COOKIES!!!
King Dedede- And for me...?
Mario- Will smoked fish do?
King Dedede- (in M. Bison's voice) YES! YES!!!
At the Interview...
Clive: What do you think of Junior?
Iggy: Junior is a big fake. My dad favors him more than any of us and he isn't even a real Koopaling.
Clive: So what is he then?
Iggy: He's a clone, just like those other so-called Baby Bowsers.
Clive: I see. Is it true that you designed the doomship?
Iggy: I helped build the doomship, although most of it was all Ludwig's work. I was Ludwig's main assistant in its design and construction.
Meanwhile, outside Peach's Castle...
Big D is seen running towards the castle. King Dedede, Meta Knight, and Waddle Dee stop him.
Waddle Dee- Sorry, but we've been hired to kill you...
Meta Knight- We won't hold back...
King Dedede- And we won't take bribes!
Big D- Great. Now I'll need backup...
He rings CliveKoopa on his mobile.
Big D- I hope this works...
Meanwhile back in the Interview room, Clive hears his phone ring.
Clive: Oh great, perfect timing. Who dares ring me in the middle of an Interview?!
Clive looks at his phone to see The Big D calling.
Clive: Oh, it's Big D, I’d better answer this. Hold on a minute, Iggy...
Clive answers the phone.
Clive: Hello Big D, what's up?
Big D- Could you put Dr Eggman on the phone? I really need help here!
Clive: Sure thing, hold on a moment while I put him on. Hey Eggman, can you come down here for a moment? Big D wants to speak to you.
Dr Eggman: I'm coming down now.
Dr Eggman walks down to where Clive and Iggy are sitting and takes the phone from Clive.
Dr Eggman: What is it, Big D? This better be important!
Big D- Eggman, do you still have the Egg Dragoon? (From Sonic Unleashed)
Dr Eggman- Yes. Why do you ask?
Big D- Can I borrow it for a moment?
Dr Eggman- Very well. I'll send it to you via teleport!
Big D- Thank you! While you're here, can you tell CliveKoopa that he gets to ask two more questions before a SHOCKING finale?
Eggman: I'll tell him that and I'll be with you very shortly.
Eggman hangs up and hands the phone back to Clive.
Eggman: Big D says you can ask Iggy two more questions before a big finale.
Clive: A big finale? Huh?
Eggman: Yes, now I must go. I'll catch ya later.
Eggman leaves the studio.
Clive: Okay, well, back to the Interview. Iggy, is it true that you are demented?
Iggy: I wouldn't say I'm demented. That's just a stereotype planted on me. I'm just different, that's all.
Clive: Okay, last question, are you and Lemmy really twins?
Iggy: No, Lemmy is older than me by a few years but he is my best friend so we might as well be twins as we do look alike. Well, that is, we used to look alike before I changed my appearance, but still, we do spend a lot of time together.
Clive: Well I'm afraid that's all we have time for, everyone. Thank you for your time, Iggy.
Iggy: It's been a pleasure. Now I'll take my leave.
Dr Eggman pulls out a remote and pushes a button, creating a small and very short earthquake. The Egg Dragoon lands behind The Big D. He gets in the cockpit.
Big D- Payback Time!
King Dedede- Oh...
Meta Knight- ... We're
Waddle Dee- ... Toast...
The Big D pushes a button and fires the electrified drill at the trio.
King Dedede, Meta Knight and Waddle Dee- BLAGIDYBLAGIDYBLAG!!!
Big D- End Transmission!
(WRITER'S NOTE- This Interview was made as a tribute to Sonic's 20th Birthday.)
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